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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in binni's LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, August 21st, 2007
2:56 pm
a girl dog with a boys name... Lionel 1992 - 2007
It's incredibly sad to turn up at your mums house to spend some time in the sunshine with your puppy only to find her 'sleeping' peacefully.

I got her when I was 13... She was the runt of the litter and very cute. She spent a happy 14 years with me before i moved out of home and left her in the capable hands of my mum & stepdad. Whoever said you can't teach an old dog new tricks is nuts, they did - with the gentle coaxing of choc chip schmackos, and her waistline showed just how clever she was!

She had cancer. We only found out about a month ago when a lump under her chin started to show. It was in her lymphnodes and the vet said there wasn't really much that could be done at her age. She was put on antibiotics, and steroids to give her a bit of a boost and seemed to be feeling fine. I didn't expect her to go so soon... I don't know if the end was due to the cancer, or if her many years just got the better of her, I only hope I didn't keep her alive in any pain.

We all loved her, the house just doesn't feel the same.

Current Mood: sombre
Monday, August 20th, 2007
3:15 pm
ughh..
im sick of this day. Enough already...

Current Mood: ughh
Wednesday, August 8th, 2007
11:42 am
Love...
I saw the movie 'The Last Kiss'
I liked it. It wasn't a cheery movie, but one i could relate to i guess. It had the good lines, the ones that get to you...

'Stop talking about love. Every asshole in the world says he loves somebody. It means nothing. It still doesn't mean anything. What you feel only matters to you. It's what you do to the people you say you love, that's what matters. It's the only thing that counts.'



'I'm in love with your daughter Stephen, Maybe that doesn't mean anything you but I'm standing here. You are her father, I am looking you in the eyes and I'm telling you I will do anything in the world to get your daughter back.

Really?

Really.

Anything?

I'll do anything.

People say that, they don't mean it.

But I mean it!

Well it's very simple... do whatever it takes.

It's that simple?

Yes... you can't fail if you don't give up.'



'People know the truth, they may not like it, or want to know it, but-, but they always know... Lie and you will lose her.'

Current Mood: contemplative
Thursday, June 7th, 2007
8:54 am
you'll love it here Tosca... you too Whikky. Kisses...
CAT HEAVEN
by Cynthia Rylant

The way to Cat Heaven is a field of sweet grass
where crickets and butterflies play.

A cat may be late in getting to Heaven . . .
there's so much fun on the way!
But an angel will wait
at the yellow front door,
wait til a kitty
comes home.

And when she arrives,
he'll give her a kiss
and some milk
in a bowl all her own.

There are trees
in Cat Heaven,
trees made just for cats,
trees growing
so green and so high.

But no one gets stuck in a tree
anymore --
if a cat wants down,
she will fly!

And oh the toys,
kitty toys everywhere,
thousands and thousands
go by.

There are buttons and baubles
and small cotton mice --
there is catnip afloat
in the sky!

There are angels,
of course,
with soft angel laps
where kitties can purr
loud and strong.


The angels will rub
kitties' noses and ears
and sing them
a Cat Heaven song.

And when cats are hungry,
there's God's kitchen counter
all covered with
white kitty dishes,
full of tuna and salmon
and mounds of sardines,
and wonderful little pink fishes.

The cats in Cat Heaven
are so loved and spoiled
God lets them all
lie on his bed . . .
He walks in His garden
with a good black book
and a kitty
asleep on His head.

Then when a cat needs,
she may just simply ponder
and watch the blue world deep and wide . . .

She will watch the old house
where she once lived and wandered,
and the people who loved her inside.

All cats love Heaven,
they know the way there,
they know where
the angel cats fly.

They'll run past the stars
and the moon and the sun . . .
. . . to curl up with God in the sky.

Current Mood: sad
Monday, April 16th, 2007
9:26 am
700 questions to get to know me better. 700!? i'll give you 120... tops
1) Name: Belinda
2) Age: 27
3) Location: Perth, Western Australia
4) Birthday: July 24th 1979
5) Height: 5'9
6) Weight: 50 kg
7) Sex: Female
8) Sexual Orientation: just the regular kind
9) Single or Taken: Taken
10) Eye Color: Blue
11) Hair Color: Brown & Blonde
12) Skin Color: white
13) Heritage: Some Irish back there somewhere
14) School/College Attending... if any?: Nope
15) Job, if any: Admin & Artwork at a Printing Company
16) Label Yourself: Label? Medium? Regular?
17) Nicknames: Binni
18) Do you like yourself?: I like me ok i guess
19) What are your parents' names?: Lloyd & Shirley
20) Do you still live with them?: No
21) What do your parents do for work?: My mummy works in gardens & cleaning, my dad drives a truck
22) Siblings?: 1 brother, 1 sister
23) Siblings' names and ages: Mark (38), Miranda (30)
24) Who is your favorite relative: My niece? i don't know i kinda like them all
25) Least favorite: ?
26) How many cousins do you have?: 2 that i know... more on my dads side
27) How many aunts and uncles?: 1 aunty on my mums side, 1 on my dads
28) How many grandparents still alive?: My mums mum is the only one
29) Name your best friend: Colin, he knows me best
30) Girl friends you're close to: Sherree
31) Guy friends you're close to: None really
32) Ever had a crush on a friend?: Yes
33) Did it ever turn into anything?: No
34) Do you believe in best friends forever?: If you try, then sure
35) Who is your shoulder to cry on?: Myself
36) Who always listens to you when you rant and rave?: Jack
37) Do you have friends at work?: Yes, between the hours of 7.30am & 4pm
38) Who was your best friend when you were little?: Joanne
39) What is your outlook on friends with benefits?: Each to their own i guess
40) Can you still be friends with your ex?: I hope so
41) Who's your newest friend?: Dan
42) What friends have you lost touch with?: Almost all of them
43) Do you ever think about calling them?: Yes
44) Do you ever drink with friends?: Sometimes
45) Which of your friends did you last spend time with?: Jack
46) ... And what did you do together?: Watched 'The Wedding Singer'
47) Do you really love your friends?: Yes
48) Do you have pets?: 2 kittens, Daisy & Pickles, that live with me. 2 cats, Tosca & Plooky, and a dog, Lionel, that live with my mum still.

49) Do you drive? and what sort of car?: Yes, Suzuki Vitara
50) Favourite food?: I love all of them. I like to eat. I guess pasta?
51) Favourite sport?: To play? i dont really do sport anymore... netball i guess
52) Chocolate or vanilla?: Vanilla... or Choc Mint mmmm
53) Rent or own?: I just built to own... yay!
54) Are you happy?: Some of the time
55) Who was your first 'crush' when you were young?: Cameron Evans
56) How about your first REAL crush?: mmm... Cameron Evans
57) When's the last time you spoke to either of those people?: I was in grade 5 so i guess 17 years ago
58) Did you ever have a crush on someone way older than you?: No
59) Like a teacher?: nope
61) How about someone alot younger?: Not alot younger, couple of years
62) Ever have a crush on the same person as your friend?: Yes
63) Who got him/her?: That would be me
64) How did you feel about it?: A little guilty, sad. She didnt like me much afterwards
65) Did it last?: Yes, 10 years
66) Who do you consider to be your first love?: Colin
67) How long did you date that person?: 10 years
68) When did this happen?: April 1996 - March/April 2006
69) Was it true love or just puppy love?: True
70) Do you believe in soulmates?: I thought so
71) How many significant others have you had?: 2
72) What was your longest relationship?: 10 years
73) Who was it with?: Once again - Colin.
74) How old are they now?: 27
75) Why did you break up?: I still don't really understand why, he was a complex character
76) How about your shortest relationship?: Maybe a couple of days =)
77) Who was it with?: Kevin
78) How old are they now?: 27
79) Why did you break up?: I dont know, it was a grade 8 whirlwind romance
80) Who really loved you?: Colin did for a while
81) Who did you really love?: Colin
82) Try to explain love: every emotion all rolled into one
83) What's your favorite love song?: I... don't know. If I aint got You - Alicia Keys?
84) Who do you want to be with right now?: In a perfect world I'd have been with my highscool sweetheart til the day i died. The worlds not perfect though...

85) Your celebrity crush: ummm... when i was younger Leonardo DiCaprio - in his 'Growing Pains' days
86) Ever been with someone your parents loved?: Yes
87) Or someone they hated?: No
88) Ever liked a relative?: when i was like 4, i thought my cousin was the greatest
89) Ever been really in love?: Yes, god, ask me again
90) Do you like being in love?: Yes & No, sometimes it hurts too damn much
91) Sometimes love just hurts, doesn't it?: Wow, its like de ja vu
92) Who's your true love?: I thought it was Colin...
93) Sexual Orientation: think we already covered this
94) How many girls have you dated?: 0
95) How many guys have you dated?: Seriously? 2
96) Did you ever question your sexuality?: No
97) Do you know the bases?: 1st, 2nd & 3rd right?
98) If so, what's your version: I dont have a version
99) Are you a virgin?: No
100) If not, what base have you been to?: I'm pretty sure being 'not a virgin' means i've been to them all
101) Ever had sex w/ a guy?: Yes
102) Ever had sex w/ a girl?: No
103) Do you want to?: Not really
104) Do you have friends who are gay?: No
105) Bisexual?: Not that i know of
106) Lesbians?: I dont think so
107) Straight?: Yes
108) Questioning their sexuality?: Not sure
109) Ever had sex in a theater?: No...
110) How about a bathroom?: In a room with a bath, yes... not a toilet
111) In a bed?: Yes
112) In a car?: Yes
113) In a MOVING car?: No
114) What do you like about guys, physically?: Eyes, Arms
115) Is sex better when you're in love?: I would say so
116) ... Or when there are no strings attached?: I've not tried the no strings thing
117) Are you kinky? Have you ever been called kinky?: I dont think so...
118) Are you dominant, submissive, or a switch?: I feel like i'm responding to a personal ad!
119) Ever had sex with a married man or woman?: No
120) Do you want children?: I did before... but now i'm not ready.
Thursday, April 5th, 2007
1:44 pm
does it really make me a better person?
The comments 'you're better off without me' and 'you deserve better than me' why do people say those things, and do they really believe it?

I mean if you're truly such a terrible person, that people are 'better off' without you? If this is something you freely admit to? Wouldn't you want to make some changes?

You can't change the past... but any actions can make a difference.

Is it just a weak excuse, or are there really people you can be better off without?

If someones willing to accept that they're better of without you, are you not better off without them?
Monday, March 26th, 2007
3:08 pm
it is what it is... and this is why.
I was waiting on a moment
But the moment never came
All the billion other moments
Were just slipping all away
I must have been tripping
Just ego tripping

I was wanting you to love me
But your love it never came
All the other love around me
Was just wasting all away
I must have been tripping
Just ego tripping

I was waiting on a moment
But the moment never came -
But the moment never came -

Current Mood: meh
Thursday, March 8th, 2007
2:55 pm
note to self... buy ready made houses
why? because building houses is hard! And when they're finally finished... they're not finished. You have windows that everyone can see into, bare plaster on the walls, concrete floors, non-existent fences and one giant sandpit for a yard. Sure, it seems like a good idea at the time...

*giggles* i love my little house.

Current Mood: happy
Tuesday, March 6th, 2007
3:04 pm
damn us and our global warming...
42C degrees for the next 3 days! sooo hot. Thats like 108F... or something. And summer is supposed to be over. Its days like these I wish that sunny Perth, Western Australia wasn't quite so sunny... or that I had an air conditioner in my house!

Current Mood: hot
Tuesday, February 27th, 2007
9:02 am
and why...
are the contemplative, confused, curious, nostalgic, pensive and thoughtful kitties all the same as the hungry kitty? do all thought related processes require you to eat your feet?

Current Mood: silly
8:50 am
well...
seems kinda obvious to me... just puzzled as to why people will make life altering decisions & choices without really thinking about the consequences.

Seems fair enough, i guess, if it only affects yourself, but how often does an action of any real importance not affect anyone else?

Things that are said, and done, can change the lives of the people around you... sometimes its for the better, but sometimes... its not.

and I am a drama queen!!

Current Mood: thoughtful
Tuesday, February 20th, 2007
12:32 pm
what the hell? i mean really... what the hell?
I might be being narrow minded and judgemental? But don't you normally think about things, i mean really think, before making decisions...

For the massive stuff... you know?

Current Mood: confused
Friday, November 3rd, 2006
3:10 pm
little babies...
I came home from work on Wednesday and there was a mama, papa and 10 newly hatched little baby ducks in our swimming pool. We kind of let it go in winter so they think its a safe secluded pond to teach their babies to swim in. We get big ducks every winter, but we havent had babies for a few years. Twas very cute... they spent the night huddled together in the skimmer box. By last night 4 of them had gotten clever (and cheeky) and were out of the pool roaming our backyard! lucky my puppy is so well behaved. But very sad this morning... during the night 5 little duckies died =( think maybe they drowned cos they werent strong enough yet to get out... or swim all night long? Odd that they made it through the first night though, i wonder why the mama didnt make them sleep in the skimmer box again...

Current Mood: sad
Thursday, November 2nd, 2006
10:31 am
again...
Work has been soo busy lately! I hate it when i have stuff to do that keeps me from my own stuff *giggles* what is with the people that expect you to work when you're at work, sheesh. But seriously... i hate it when you dont have time for yourself, and all you do is get up, go to work, come home, cook, clean, sleep... blech.

Current Mood: busy
Wednesday, September 20th, 2006
10:13 am
missing in action...
So i've been awol for over 6 weeks! How time flies when you aren't having so much fun. My friends always say they can tell when i'm not so happy because i kind of just keep to myself...

In saying that, its kind of funny how there's some people you see day in day out for years that have absolutely no grasp on your character whatsoever. Kind of an insult i think... and to be so greatly misinterperated makes you wonder why people have you around in the first place?

Oh! a happy note... my brother and sister in law had a little baby girl on Friday the 15th of September. Born a chubby 9 pound 11 ounces and 54.5cm.

Current Mood: headache-y
Tuesday, September 19th, 2006
10:07 am
one of those months... AGAIN!
Do they never end? I dont know what it is about me but i really seem to attract a life that i just dont want.

The crappest month at work EVER. So sick of working amongst the boys club which is my place of employment... and why is it that males feel the need to be males and totally overlook every valid piece of input i may have? My boss told me recently 'you shouldn't think... you should just do what i say' which i could understand... if i was 7. This is my tenth year with them and one might say i kind of have a grasp for my job by now. I'm not stupid - in my opinion - and i have a pretty good idea of what the company is about... but i mustn't speak. Apparently girls should be seen but not heard. Who knew?!

Its really weird how life turns around... at the start of the year i really liked it here - obviously, since i've been here for so long - but i mean i REALLY liked it. Everyone was good to be around, it was comfortable and relaxed. I was actually convincing other staff members that its not a bad place to work... now i need someone to convince me.

Current Mood: meh
Friday, August 4th, 2006
9:54 am
a kidnapper...
I spent the afternoon with my nephew yesterday, haven't seen him in a while, he's such a little livewire. Crazy crazy kid. He's adopted, from Ethiopia, but been here for a couple of years now and really come out of his shell.

I had to pick him up from day care, which i've never done before, they have all these security measure to stop people kidnapping their children i guess? The parents all have a security code to open the door... random people, like me, ring a bell. I told the girl who answered to door i was there to pick my nephew and she checked my ID and told me he was out the back. I walked through the entire centre, out to the playground out back where he was. I waved to him and, even though he looked at me curiously, he waved back. I told the girl out there i was there to pick him up and she was like 'no worries i'll get his bag for you.' So i take the kid, and the bag, and walk back through the centre and out the front door before someone stops me. This lady goes 'Ummm... we don't know who you are, none of us have ever seen you before...'

My god! they wait til i'm out the front door, with a kid, before they ask??

I told her i showed my license to someone and she's like 'ok then, no worries' didn't even double check. Crazy! I could have just taken anyones kid! Great security people.

The story doesn't stop there... i drive him home and played with him for about an hour and he goes to me 'What's your name?' He had no idea who i was! No wonder he looked at me curiously! Somewhat ammusing... but just not considering he left daycare with a total stranger! When my brother got home he was like 'Yeah... he just really hates daycare'

Again... my god! *giggles* he just saw an opportunity to get out and took it.

Current Mood: complacent
Thursday, August 3rd, 2006
2:56 pm
I cant believe i'm 27 now. Eeek! I got so old so quick. I never would have dreamt that at 27 i'd still be at home living with my mum *giggles* what a sad sad story. And there are so many things i thought i would have accomplished by now, life is totally not what i planned!

I think maybe i went about everything the wrong way? I was always eager to share in the experiences and kind of expected people to want to share mine, it just didn't work out like that. I spent the latter part of my life sharing my hopes and dreams and just waiting for someone to join in... i guess i'd still be waiting now if i hadn't come to the realization that i'd probably miss out on everything if i didn't go out and do it by myself!

*thinks* Nope, that just doesn't seem right either...

Current Mood: confused
Wednesday, August 2nd, 2006
3:38 pm
more stuff to bring me down...
What a weekend. I'm so completely over being down, it really is exhausting. The story goes that if you're not happy with your life then do something about it... i dont even know what i can do. My heart and mind are both in 2 places... its like everything i want is being taken from me again and i dont know what to do to hold on...

Current Mood: confused
Monday, July 24th, 2006
3:15 pm
well thank god...
a defining moment has provided the clarity that has been missing to help resolve an ongoing personal problem. Time now to pay particular attention to ideas and dreams as hidden messages could come through in unusual or unexpected ways.... more so than being hidden i wonder?

is Bob Evans any better than Kevin Mitchell?

Current Mood: chipper
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